If I didn’t know what it felt like to be glued by words and later get detached from the ‘norm’
Then I wouldn’t know what it feels like to be kept head over heels then get dropped in a flip
If I didn’t know how frustrating it can be to believe in that which would later bring you down
Then I wouldn’t understand how deep some phrases could damage
So, I’m forever thankful for some of the ruins that I was able to stand in
For sometimes it takes one to stand in the dark to notice a special kind of light
A light that redefines what you’d tried to define a while back, in a culture determined to make us feel less than
It’s the kind of light that you can trust your heart to as well as your brokenness
The kind of light you can trust with your successes and failures, your smiles and tears and even most importantly your vulnerabilities and strengths
The kind of light that appreciates every simple milestone you take either alone or together
It’s in this light that you get to appreciate the rejection for with it you can now appreciate the joy of finding a home
There’s something about this thing they call affection or rather adoration that gets to be rerouted together with the energy that had deflected a while back
The kind of energy that’s felt in the ‘your’ presence, which matches perfectly with the light
Maybe no perfect words can define this special kind of light but it’s clearly the kind that radiates words worth entertaining for they match the actions
A light that’s in a presence that even when I try describing, I end up smearing every bit of my heart on every page to remind me there can be beauty even in the ruins
And for some reason, this light can bring out words which when uttered or scribbled seem to rhyme or close to that
Which, in the presence of ‘you’ might have happened and it wasn’t just words nor was it poetry but every single word was meant
See, sometimes you’re not even looking … well, I wasn’t looking for any form of light but you just flipped the script…
Muthoni 